A little detour again- love it or hate it :)


Questions for myself

What does it mean
when i dream
Why cant i live life
on the mountains
When will i try
When will i give in
to what I feel
When can i lead
When will I fall asleep
knowing the truth
Why cant i fall
into the light

Why dont i know it all
Why cant i see it all
Why am i blind
to what runs in my mind


What brings you here?

The Eight one

Desire

Desire propells us forward. desire can bring us down. There are many things that i have longed for and so few that i have gotten( atleast thats what i think) .

What hurts us the most is when we want something thats so out of our league. It maybe the best thing that may ever happen to you but you can never have it. You think you do everything right but the goal is so much at another level that you will have to change yourself to get it.

Thats where the trouble starts. The change you may have to go through may be just an extension of yourself ( the tiger within) or a completely new persona. This becomes the secondary goal to fulfil your desire.

The seventh one

Change

Of all things change is probably what really really bugs me. Maybe because it was hardly ever there. but most probably it is because of my constant evaluation of the future. Whenever a change happens its consequences are felt almost immediately but when a change is sensed the thought of the result of the change is worse than the change itself ( figure that out!!:)) This forecast of change results in anxiety, tension and all kinds of mental crap.

Gone are the laid back life style of the towns. In the city change happens evry second. For most people change is just a distraction or a detour. They can live through it without the kind of impact it does to me.

All changes, good or bad have taken its toll on me. It never was an "issue" a few months ago. but now im begging for the rate of change to slow down.

Since this is on a personal note, No comments!!